Frenemy the Christmas Cat

Paws have hidden socks by the chimney with care

Sofas have been decorated with wisps of cat hair

Ornaments rearranged, some onto the floor

While human owners trek to the store

To buy treats of turkey and chicken

And thick dark gravy perfect for lickin’

The room is quiet and dark except for the glow

From the Christmas tree, covered in fake snow

The silence in the house gives Frenemy a pause

As she examines the rat kidney she left for Santa Paws.

She’s been a good kitty, no scratching this year

She made all the rats and mice and frogs disappear

No vomiting on anyone’s favorite shoes

And only once did she steal the cashews

Her eyes grow heavy as she waits for his appearance

Promising herself not to cause interference

Yet she falls asleep, way too early,

Missing the man that smells like stale burley.

While he gobbles up his fresh rat kidney

He checks the list for a gift for Frenemy.

She wakes up surprised to find presents galore

And bats around the gifts, searching for

The one addressed to best kitty ever

certain it will contain a toy mouse made of leather.

No where to be found, she flops over with a sigh.

She’s a tough cat, she’s not going to cry.

Scissors are found and waved about, ready to cut,

the paper and tape while Frenemy licks her butt.