Happy Fourth of July! I hope you managed to schedule spending time with family and friends, or doing something that you enjoy. This holiday should lure you outside to grill up burgers, veggie or the muscle kind, while swatting away mosquitoes or you could just chill while watching the colorful fireworks explode against the night sky.

I will be doing none of the above. I made the decision to remained holed up inside so I can work on my costume for the Comicpalooza panel I was going to lead. Who needs fun outside when you can make a costume?

To create the base of the costume, I needed a pair of white leggings. Perhaps I should have ordered them online a few weeks ago, but the local stores in Houston assured me that the unflattering pants waiting for me on the shelf.  All I had to do was drive to the store. It would only cost $10.72 in gas for the round trip, my time, and sweat lost because of the 100-degree heat.

This way I could check out the thinness of the fabric, and determine if the waist band would come up to my arm pits. High rise pants and a short person is not a winning combination.

None of the stores had them in stock. I scrambled back to my house and got on my laptop, (I’m not a google-search-on-your-phone kind of gal.) and I found myself out of luck.

Too sheer. Too expensive. Too long to ship. Too small. Too big. My inner-Goldilocks must have gone on vacation, because I did not find anything “just right.”

A sinking sensation filled my gut. Without my base, how would I pull off the fabulous costume?

What would the host of “At Home With Amy Sedaris” do? She would wrap paper around her legs, and tape them to make pants. They’d be stylish and functional and would make crinkling noises when you walked.

I don’t have tape. Besides, once you get them on, how do you get them off without ripping them?

Wait, I could purchase gray leggings and bleach them white.  That should work.

Don’t comment on that.

In any case, I will make my costume, however good or bad it turns out, and pictures will follow on my website and social media pages. Stay tuned!