The mug shakes when I accidentally bump into the table. Droplets of hot 2023 optimism caffeinated liquid spills on to the surface. I wipe it up, a smidgen less optimistic than before. Still, the mug is full, and I’m ready to drink what I like to call my New Year’s Resolution coffee.

It’s the first cup of coffee I have of the new year. I haven’t taken a sip yet, but am confident I used the correct ration of grounds to water, sugar and half-half. This will be consumed while I create my New Year’s Resolutions List.

Sure, I failed at nearly all of mine from last year, and if I take a moment to be honest with myself, will fail at all of them this
year. My plan to trek on the treadmill every day and lift weights every other day did not happen. But I don’t care. I love starting the year brimming with enthusiasm for changing myself, making life improvements, and trying new activities.

Wincing, I drink my hot beverage. I pray it’s not an indication of the year to come, too bitter yet too sweet.

Yes, I will make resolutions, not intentions. For years we’ve had it drilled into our head by magazine articles, TV hosts and
psychologists, if you make a new year’s resolution, give it concrete details, so it’s more likely to happen. Don’t use vague phrases and terminology. 

Now people are saying, don’t make resolutions, set intentions.

Wait, what?

Resolve vs intend. 

Resolution vs intention.

One word is stronger, more emphatic, more concentrate.

Here’s a hint.

The United Nations (UN) says United Nations Resolution #432,  not United Nations Intentions #432.

If I say I intend to go running later, it implies there’s a chance I might not go. If I say I resolve to go to the running at the park,
that’s a firmer word choice, and a show of actual future plans.

Someone said I was missing the point, that intentions were generalizations about over all changes and mood, like “I set the intention to be a better person.”

Better person. What does that mean? Does that mean posting platitudes with photos of cats dangling from trees to inspire
people and thus make you a better person? How is that being a better person?

Does that mean once a week volunteering to clean the park and an additional day a week to feed the homeless? Or does it mean you will cuss at people less? How much effort does one have to make to go from a mediocre person to a better person?

Too vague and honestly, too annoying.

Here’s the worst of the Debbie Downer New Year Resolution nay-sayers: embrace and accept your flaws, be kind to yourself.

So, I’m suppose to embrace my mediocrity, smile at my unhealthy fat squeezing my heart, and welcome my ever-shrinking ability to walk stairs. Do not bother to change anything. Don’t try anything new or different or fun. Remain the same. Be kind to yourself.

Sounds like a cop-out.

And a bunch of nonsense.

I want change, for better or worse.

Besides, if I fail, I will not cry tears into my now cold cup of 2023 optimism coffee. I will simply shrug and move those items to the following year’s list.

In the end, who cares what people think. Do what you wish. Set intentions. Don’t make resolutions. Agree to embrace being out of shape. For myself, I wish to set resolutions.

1. Eat less cheese. Do I really have to explain that one? We all know cheese, with its full fat, creamy yummyness, isn’t the best for human cardiovascular system or waistlines

a. Steps to
take- um, eat less cheese?

b. Eat barley
instead of cheese

2. Lose 20 pounds. Yikes, how did I let that much additional fat latch on to my body?

a. Steps to take – see above

b. Eat more vegetables

c. Eat lentils three times a week

d. Eat steamed or raw cabbage 3 times a week

e. Exercise more (um, at all?)

                                          i.   Do old lady yoga – fun and easy

                                          ii.   Return to running – start with walking, then walk running, followed by running and increasing to 6 miles a day, 5 times a week, Easy peasy.

3. Drink less wine. It’ll help with the top two resolutions. After all, it’s caloric and what goes great with a glass of wine? Cheese!

a. Steps to take – don’t buy wine

b. No wine when eating out.  Done

4. Learn to sew – I’ve been collected fabric for years. It’s time to do something with them.

a. Steps to take – purchase sewing machine

b. Read manual to sewing machine

c. Watch youtube videos on how to sew

d. Buy some patterns

e. Start sewing!

5. Make a lizard costume, and take photos crawling out of the ditches at Bear Creek
Park.

a. Steps to take – see NYR above

b. Make costume, figure out the best fabric,

c. Recruits friends to help

d. Schedule one weekend or two. Whatever it takes

6. Write another book

a. Outline

b. Write every day, minimum one paragraph

Typically, I’d come up with an additional five resolutions but have decided to stop here. 2022 was a busy year, and I need a bit of down time.